I’ve wanted to start a blog for a while now, but haven’t really known how to go about it – do you just start writing? Or do you plan every post out for weeks beforehand? What are these posts even about? At the moment, my website is simply a platform for showcasing my work, rather than venting my feelings about a topic or promoting a business. And to be quite honest, in the last two years since leaving university, there hasn’t been much new work to write about.
Recently, I’ve been wondering why this is the case – no one can deny that I have always been creative. Some of the best childhood memories I have involve illustrating my very own stories, inventing and drawing new characters (usually some variation of Mr Men and Little Miss) and constructing the Hogwarts Express from an extensive collection of toilet rolls and drawing pins.
I always loved art at school, (apart from a brief period at GCSE when I tried a more conceptual approach and ended up with the most disturbing piece I’ve ever created, featuring bondage-style teddy bears hanging helplessly from a board, supposedly demonstrating the idea of ‘sanctuary’…) and focused my work experience placements on graphic design departments, before getting my first part time job as a facepainter; a decidedly arty job.
I think that the reason for my shortage of inspiration in the last few years is the same reason that has prevented me from starting a blog until now – self-consciousness. I am worried about what people will think of my work, worried that they will criticise it, and worried that I won’t be able to bounce back from said criticism and carry on. As you will realise if you browse this site, much of my work is based on nature; more specifically on ‘cutesy’ animals, because this is what I enjoy drawing. I will never forget one of my final critiques in uni, when my tutor stared at a lamb I had drawn for use on a greetings card, and remarked that it would be a lot more effective if I juxtaposed an axe next to it. An axe.
The other day I got rejected from a job for apparently being ‘too nice’. And that, combined with the lamb and axe incident, is what has made me realise that I am never going to please everyone. So, art-wise, I might as well just aim to please myself to start with, and any other people who are made happy along the way are an added bonus. What happened to that little girl who didn’t care what anyone else thought, she was going to spend hours of her time scribbling, glueing, cutting and colouring in to create some bizarre piece of artwork that, ultimately, she was proud of? I need to become more like her once more. Therefore, I’m going to start this blog, create artwork that makes me happy, and maybe even start a collection of toilet rolls again, who knows.